Information on Coaching

Frequently Asked Questions

The decision to seek out and work with a coach is an act of courage. Nevertheless, you may have some additional questions before you sign up. My hope is to answer those questions here.  If your question isn’t on this page, please feel free to reach out and ask your question.

Do I really need a coach?

Sure you could do this on your own. After all, the Nice Guy tendency is to go it alone.  We’re so afraid of asking for help and looking weak that we suffer in silence.
You know the definition of insanity right? It’s doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
In the end, it’s a personal decision, but ask yourself the question; what lengths am I willing to go to get the kind of life I really want?

Is this confidential?

In terms of confidentiality, unless you are in imminent danger of hurting yourself or others, if there is child abuse or elder abuse taking place this will be reported.  Unless you give me your written permission, our work is confidential.

My goal is to create a place of safety for you to explore how you operated in the world and find solutions to problems.

How do we meet?

If you live in the Portland Oregon area or can travel to Portland, we can meet in my office.

However, because many of my clients are from around the world, we most often will meet online in a secure video conference room.

Is this Therapy?

This is coaching not therapy. The distinction is that therapy is based on a medical model of treating mental illness.  In therapy, the therapist is required to give you a diagnosis that fits within certain criteria that are set by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders Version 5 (DSM-V).

The Nice Guy Syndrome isn’t a mental illness and is not listed in the DSM.  Instead, it’s a set of behaviors based on faulty beliefs that create dysfunction in the major domains of person’s life.

Therapy seeks to resolve and treat mental illness. Coaching seeks to figure out more productive ways to operate in the world.

Although I am a Licensed Professional Counselor in the state of Oregon and sometimes coaching interventions and therapeutic interventions overlap, this is NOT therapy.  If I discover a mental illness after working with a coaching client, I will refer you to a professional therapist in your area.

Do you work with women?

Yes. There are two primary reasons women could benefit from coaching.

First, women sometimes find they are in a relationship with a Nice Guy and wants to understand his behaviors so she will seek a coach.

Second, the Nice Guy syndrome isn’t isolated towards gender. Many women read the description and find it reflects their own behaviors.

Is this covered by insurance?

No.  Insurance only covers medical conditions. The Nice Guy Syndrom is not a medical or mental illness. While the “nice guy" may also be suffering from mental disorders, this is not a treatment for such. If I find that there a medical issue or that a mental illness exists, I may suggest you seek out individual therapy to work on those issues separately.

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